Culturally Irrelevant

My wife went out with a guy one time who looked into her eyes from across the table and asked this question: “So, is this going anywhere, or am I just wasting my time?”

Ouch.

Needless to say, that relationship did NOT go anywhere. My wife, the classy woman that she is, laughed and moved on. This story came up the other morning as my wife and I were talking about the temptation to have a selfish agenda in prayer.

For me, it would sound something like “Ok, God, if I’m going to get out of bed this early or get on my knees instead of watching TV, you better show up” (aka, you better make this worth my time!!!) Ha ha, now that’s funny! And if that sounds presumptuous and arrogant…that’s because it is! And most of us are guilty of this until he busts us up with his heart for the lost and what’s really going on. In fact, there have been times when I didn’t want to sit there for an hour and nothing happen, so I just skipped out and did something else instead.

When I was a teenager, there were three things that could make me really cranky: 1. lack of sleep, 2. an empty stomach, and 3. getting wrapped up in my own world. That’s pretty much still true, even though I’m 33 not 13. I’m learning how to deal with the first two (kind of), to which every parent of small children can relate. But that third one still hangs me up.

My mom used to say “Benjamin, go do something for someone else and you’ll feel better.” And it really works. But in the context of prayer and intimacy with the Father it sounds more like, “Son, get thankful and then intercede for the people I’ve put on your heart.” Once I start down the road of lining up with his agenda, prayer comes alive and what’s in his heart blows everything else away…my agenda included.

A couple mornings ago I was up early praying for the nation and the realization hit me that, like individuals, cities and nations have root to fruit connections. What I mean by root to fruit connection is that there is an undeniable link between the symptoms we display and the deeper roots that nourish those symptoms. Jesus said “you’ll know them (the root falseness of self-proclaimed prophets) by their fruit (outward symptoms of speech and behavior). I began to learn about the personal significance of the root to fruit connection from Bethesda, Dominic Herbst’s relational healing model that I blogged about a while back.

It really clicked as I started praying about some of the policies and bills being considered right now in Washington D.C. I suddenly realized that these issues are just the fruit of so many roots we have as a nation: epidemic fatherlessness, rejection and hatred against minority races, and millions of mothers of aborted babies who are filled with guilt, fear, and the pain of abandonment. Millions of our neighbors and friends and countrymen have nurtured deep rejection and bitterness in their hearts. As people hold on to these wounds, they fester and lead to rage, abuse, suicide, rebellion and even mental and physical diseases.

I’m sure there are more root issues, but these are the major ones I thought about as I prayed for the people in our country. Could it be that this is why the socialistic philosophy gaining ground in our government doesn’t alarm many of the public in our nation? It makes me wonder. I mean, what abandoned child doesn’t want someone big and strong to take care of them and fill that void? But where does the healing come from? What is our responsibility as the church to the lost and hurting people in our nation?

As I began to think about all of this, I remembered being told one time that this is exactly why Hitler’s regime was so overwhelmingly accepted. He rose to influence at a time when so many of Germany’s young men (and women) were fatherless due to WWI. His charisma, power and strong vision met a deep need, in a way, that everyone had. I can see the same thing happening in our nation, but in a much more subtle way. Not because so many Dads are dying in war, but because they’re gone, checked out, distracted. I bet at this point fatherlessness is one of the deepest, if not the deepest, root issue in our nation. (Go to http://fatherandson.org for one ministry that is addressing this problem head on). Afterall, how can we as a nation come to the Father if our idea of a father has been so beat up and twisted?

Needless to say, my prayers are changing from surface issues to deeper issues. It seems like this is valuable information for intercessors. What do you think? What are you sensing and hearing from the Holy Spirit as you pray for America? What needs to change in the way we’re doing ministry in order to address these deeper issues? One thing I’m thinking a lot about is Malachi 4:5-6. Reconciliation to the father’s heart seems key to ministry in the Last Days, and I believe it’s happening.

Nehemiah 3:5 says that the nobles of Tekoa were unwilling to put their shoulders to the task of rebuilding the wall. They were important people and manual labor was beneath them…technically. However, the “men” of Tekoa went straight to work on the wall. In fact, these same men went the extra mile and worked on another section of the wall in verse 27.

Katy and I are beginning to see the “wall” of prayer. Like a wall, prayer protects, creates spiritual boundaries, stages both offensive and defensive maneuvers, supports watchmen and acts as a filter for what comes in and goes out. I’ve heard it taught that only some are called to a life of prayer. I used to accept that, but not anymore. I believe we tend to see the hard labor of prayer as someone else’s job in the body. That’s convenient, but not true. Every single one of us has been called to the secret place to pull on and discern the Father’s heart, to cry out for unity in the body, to ask for more laborers and lost souls, to be filled with the Spirit on a regular basis.

The Bible is full of examples of unceasing prayer (e.g., Joshua in the tent of meeting) and teaches us to pray constantly. In the Spirit, in the understanding, with songs, with instruments, in the morning and evening, alone and with others, during good times and bad. I’ve struggled with this for years, trying my best to “practice the presence of God” like Brother Lawrence teaches. But it becomes a difficult exercise of always trying to get back into a place that I feel I’ve lost. 

The good news is that it’s not up to our own discipline, emotional energy, force of will or mental capacity to grasp the things before us. God graciously empowers us to do the very things he requires of us. In “The Release of the Spirit” Watchman Nee explains that our spirits long to have constant fellowship with God, but the trouble is with the hardened shell of the soul. When unbroken, my thoughts, criticism, planning, emotional swings, and willfulness all act independently to hinder what the Spirit is trying to work out through me. In essense, because of the Spirit’s presence and work in me, my spirit is ready to fellowship with God, to touch other people, to pour out from the anointing that’s available. But because my thoughts, the way I feel about things and my will to have things a certain way, are so powerful and insistent , I’m having to use my soul to sit at the wall of prayer. Instead of my spirit being the free vessel, my soul becomes the constricting filter by which I experience God, receive revelation, minister to others, etc.

So, I’m at the wall, reading Watchman Nee and hanging out around John 15 right now. I’m asking God to search my heart and shine his spotlight of truth into my deepest motives and the things I say in my mind when I’m not paying attention. In the meantime, we’re beginning to see bits and pieces of God’s heart more and more. For the lost, for the body of Christ all over the world, for this new generation of young people, for kids and baby Christians. And we’re just taking it to the wall.

I don’t look for weird things to happen. In fact, I try very hard to ignore them and stick to what I’m sure of. But sometimes you just can’t ignore the obvious. It started on our stop in Vicksburg on the way to Pensacola a couple weeks ago. When I checked in at the hotel, the girl at the desk gave me the electronic keys and said, “You’ll be in room 333.” Instantly, I was hit with Jeremiah 33:3. It was the reference my parents put in the front of my first NKJV study Bible when I graduated from high school. I don’t think a week has gone by since then that I haven’t thought about that Scripture. It has always been important to me. As I was walking away from the desk towards the car I felt the Holy Spirit saying, “Ben, call to me and I’ll answer you.” I told Katy about it when I got in the car.

The next morning we stopped for gas before leaving town. I pre-paid with cash and then went in to collect my change. I picked up a bottle of water for Katy and then went to the register. As I stood there I wondered, “Wouldn’t it be cool if my change was $3.33?” And just like that, the girl rang up my water and there on the register was my change…$3.33! So I smiled and walked to the car and told Katy. We both just laughed and recognized that God has a pretty funny sense of humor.

To make things more interesting, two nights in a row this week I’ve sat up in bed in the middle of the night, wide awake. Both times I’ve looked at the clock and it has been 3:33am. This morning, right after my alarm went off and I hit snooze, Katy and I both sat up in bed because of a noise coming from downstairs. It sounded like a dog barking. Katy stuck her head out the door to listen and said, “It’s one of Jack’s toys. Sounds like it was left on and has a short in it.” So I fumbled down the stairs at 5:30am and began to recognize the sound of Barney like a broken record, repeating the same syllable over and over again. How long it had been stuck like that, I don’t know. But as soon as my feet hit the tile floor, it said clear as day, “Hello, friend. Let’s spend the day together!” Ha! Now that’s rich. I just had to laugh. I was going to sleep in, but that dumb toy got me downstairs and now I was wide awake to hear it say that! I just stood there and thought, “There’s no end to the creative and quirky ways that God will draw us…and even trick us…to seek him, call on him and spend time with him.

Needless to say, I get the point. God is getting through loud and clear. I’ve been spending some time in the book of Nehemiah. I’ve never thought about Nehemiah as a book about prayer, but God is opening my eyes. I’ll throw some things out here in a couple days as I dig a little deeper.

Most people write a post like this, apologizing for not posting because they’ve been too busy to write. My problem has been the opposite. Lots of late nights writing, just on the same project. At some point here in the next week or so I hope to be able to post it as a PDF with a few excerpts to summarize what it’s about.

Here’s a quick excerpt on prayer. Not the overall topic, but a supporting point:

David talked to God with gut-wrenching honesty. He exposed himself, spoke his mind, unafraid to be completely real and emotional. He didn’t have long lists of things he wanted for himself or for his success. He asked for nations, for God’s presence, for forgiveness, for the righteous to be filled. When I read his songs I hear agonizing desperation, ravenous spiritual appetite for God’s presence, ecstatic joy at knowing God, tremendous peace and a sense of being protected by God and led by his Spirit. I also hear anger against unrighteousness and injustice, frustration at God’s silence in the face of wickedness, and the desire for God to completely crush his enemies.

Jesus talked about prayer this way (my interpretation): “When you pray, don’t philosophize and eloquently verbalize just to impress your listeners with your knowledge of the scriptures. And don’t babble on and on with useless words that don’t come from your heart. Instead, get on your face in a quiet, secret place. Pour your heart out like a sinner and receive grace like a saint. Get real with me and I’ll get real with you. Don’t know what to say? Start with coming to me as your loving, all-powerful “Father” who knows what you need before you even ask. Then worship me and let the power of my name, my Kingdom and my holy will overcome you. Hang there for a while, maybe even get quiet, and then make any simple requests for the things you need. And if you’ve got a beef with anyone, you better take care of that before you come to me. It’s hard to hear anything when your offenses, unforgiveness and self-righteous pride are screaming so loudly in my ears. But come to me with a broken heart and I’ll answer you. If you’re dirty, repent for real and I’ll wash you and give you a clean conscience. If you’ll stay in this place, this heart attitude, then I’ll know you’re connected to my Son. I’ll give you what you want because I know your wants and desires are coming from him. And if the answers don’t seem to come right away, keep pressing in. It’s all in my timing, so don’t be discouraged. Just keep coming and trusting. You won’t be disappointed. (Matthew 5:23-24; 6:5-13; Psalm 24:3-5; 51:17; Luke 11:8-10; John 15:5-11; James 5:16)

And what is the promise when we have a life of prayer like this? Peace. A supernatural, comforting, able-to-handle-anything kind of peace. Paul says it this way: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7)

Honestly, there have been times when I’ve been so distressed and afraid that I’ve wanted to quit walking forward in obedience. But when that happens, I hit my face, usually with 2 or 3 other guys who are faith-filled God-seekers, and after a while I’m so filled with peace and a sense of God’s good pleasure that I’m able to keep going. An encouraging word will come out, I’ll get a revelation from a specific passage of scripture, or sometimes I’ll just lay there and soak in God’s presence for a while. Either way you slice it, the result is still the same. The weight gets transferred. The doubt gets exchanged for strength and faith. The fear turns into hope. When I get up from the floor I have the strength, not just to keep going, but to walk in love, to know what I should do next, or simply to have the peace to not do anything at all except keep trusting, keep waiting and keep seeking his face. And sometimes that’s the hardest thing…to not do.